The sages have fixed that every three people who sit together to eat together must make a summons before saying Birkat Hamazon (for those who do not know – this is a sentence in which we are meant to bless God together).
Men and women do not join together for a summons, so if there are two men and a woman, they should not make a summons, only if there are three men or three women, but if the men make a summons, the woman can answer them and vice versa.
There is a difference between men and women, that men must summon, and women do not have to, but of course it is a mitzvah, and if you know how to summon and eat with two other women, certainly a summons should be made.
Although Korach tried to achieve a positive goal, he failed, and not only failed to get what he wanted, but he lost and went down to hell.
Why did he make that mistake?
The Sages tell us that the Korach had a personal touch, aside from the matter of the mitzva, the sanctity of the positive goal, behind the scenes there was another goal, to achieve honor, and when there is a hidden purpose, even if it is not known to the person himself, his actions are no longer pure. Mistakes. They call it a “personal touch”.
Several times in life we try to reach some goal, a positive goal, and we are confident that our path is correct, but in the end we fail.
Because deep in our hearts we had other goals, hidden from us. You were sure you had to tell everyone what this friend of yours did, that maybe she does not keep something, and you have to tell everyone, and maybe it’s true, but maybe deep inside you also have a personal touch, maybe some personal anger about her, maybe jealousy, maybe getting honor from the “disgrace of your friend “- that the fact that the second person is not right, it makes you look even better.
Therefore, the sages said, “You should get yourself a rabbi” – that we should have a man who can help us make decisions so that we will not make mistakes with our husband, the children, the friends, our life. To find a person who understands the human soul, the touches that may be in the heart, can show us the way in a clearer way, and this is, of course, parallel to learning Torah, studying morality every day, and observing and thinking about our actions.